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This Week’s Guest:
When you show up at a cocktail party, do you immediately run in and shout all sorts of amazing things about yourself? I hope the answer is no! Think of your social media networking like a cocktail party. To get better results, remember that there are people on the other end of all those social media accounts. Engage in genuine conversations and interactions instead of barging in and promoting yourself.
David Burkus, a bestselling author and sought-after speaker, joins me in this episode to explore this concept and many others related to social networking. David is an associate professor of leadership and innovation at Oral Roberts University, and has delivered keynotes to the leaders of Fortune 500 companies. His newest book, Friend of a Friend, offers readers a fresh perspective on how to grow their networks and build key connections. If you want to learn scientifically based tips, tools, and techniques for tapping into the power of your network, tune in to this episode!
Find Out More About David Here:
In This Episode:
- [01:17] – David launches off the episode by talking about why he wrote his new book.
- [03:51] – Does Metcalfe’s Law come into play in the science of networking?
- [06:40] – We hear David’s thoughts on certain other well-known networking books, and his perspective on what they’re lacking.
- [08:40] – David talks about some of the practical tools that he has mentioned, and discusses the three categories of ties.
- [11:58] – The best-practice idea in sales of maintaining a 90-day contact frequency is conventional wisdom, David explains.
- [13:35] – What does David personally do to keep his weak ties alive and to revive his dormant ties?
- [17:27] – Stephan talks about a case study he heard about recently involving personalizing messaging. David then shares his thoughts on this personal element.
- [19:46] – David talks about what he does to maintain his social networks in a way that doesn’t frustrate him.
- [23:28] – We hear David’s advice on etiquette surrounding the social media platforms that he uses.
- [25:05] – Stephan shares a framework he learned at a mastermind event, which involves doing the unexpected.
- [28:54] – David shares his thoughts on LIONs on LinkedIn.
- [33:42] – Based on science, how would David recommend maximizing the power of a connector?
- [36:04] – We hear what David is doing to be a broker in the sense that he has been describing.
- [36:53] – Is David looking into any new social networks?
- [38:53] – Stephan brings up a specific case example to clarify David’s points, and David talks about the tools, strategies, and platforms he would use in that example.
- [41:55] – Where people feel like networking gets sleazy is where they feel like people are only connecting each other to try to get the sale immediately.
- [44:48] – David talks about another use case, using the example of someone looking for a job.
- [49:05] – Stephan brings up one more specific use case, this time involving a hypothetical affiliate marketer.
- [52:58] – We hear about where David’s book leads in his larger strategy.
- [56:07] – Stephan is reminded of a case study example of a launch leveraging close ties.
- [60:06] – Where can listeners get in touch with David or learn more from him? In his answer, he offers Marketing Speak listeners a special gift! Head to this link to get yours.
Links and Resources:
- David Burkus
- David Burkus on Facebook
- David Burkus on LinkedIn
- @davidburkus on Twitter
- Friend of a Friend: Understanding the Hidden Networks That Can Transform Your Life and Your Career by David Burkus
- David Burkus’ TED Talk: Why You Should Know How Much Your Coworkers Get Paid
- Metcalfe’s Law
- Adam Rifkin
- Adam Grant: Give and Take
- Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi
- How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
- Taki Moore
- What Is LinkedIn Open Networking?
- The Oracle of Bacon
- Malcolm Gladwell
- Jane McGonigal
- Jay Abraham on Marketing Speak: Build Your Business With The Strength Of The Parthenon
- Jay Abraham on Marketing Speak: Using SEO to Its Full Potential
- Justin Bieber’s ‘What Do You Mean’: Inside The Star-Studded Social Media Campaign
- Free audio course from David Burkus (special gift for Marketing Speak listeners!)
Your Checklist of Actions to Take
☑ Categorize the people I know into three types: close ties, weak ties and dormant ties. Know how to specifically deal with each group.
☑ Make it a regular habit to check in with my ties, even the weak and dormant ones. Message them every couple of months to keep the relationship alive.
☑ Gradually integrate myself into a new network. Don’t just introduce and propose a business deal right away but gain their trust and friendship first.
☑ Be more personal and authentic when reaching out or checking in with others. Write a heartfelt email or send gifts on special occasions.
☑ Socialize offline. Emails and regular contact on social media is good but it’s better to spend time face-to-face to create a strong bond.
☑ Be mindful of my social media etiquette on different platforms. My Twitter activity should be different from my LinkedIn posts.
☑ Utilize tools such as ConvertKit and Bonjoro to help me organize my appointments and meetups.
☑ Ask people the question “who do you know in (my industry)?” This can be a good way to learn about influencers and authorities in my field.
☑ Check out David’s free audio course for Marketing Speak listeners called How To Give and Get The Introductions That Will Transform Your Life and Your Career.
☑ Grab a copy of David Burkus’ book, Friend of a Friend: Understanding the Hidden Networks That Can Transform Your Life and Your Career.
S: If you wanna tap the power of your network using tips, tools, techniques that are based on science? This episode number 135 is for you. Our guest today is David Burkus. He’s a bestselling author, a sought-after speaker, and associate professor of leadership and innovation at Oral Roberts University. His newest book, Friend of a Friend, offers readers a new perspective on how to grow their networks and build key connections—ones based on science of human behavior—not wrote networking advice. He’s delivered keynotes to the leaders of Fortune 500 companies and the future leaders of United States Naval Academy. His TED Talk has been viewed over 1.8 million times and he’s a regular contributor to the Harvard Business Review. David, welcome to the show.
D: Thank you so much for having me.
S: Let’s talk about your new book. I’m sure you get a lot of questions around that. If you could tell me why you wrote this book, that’ll be some nice insightful story telling for our listeners.
D: It’s in the midst of launch, you’re talking about the book all the time. But it’s like a new baby, you don’t mind showing photos, you don’t mind talking about it. This was actually a weird pivot for me. My prior book was actually about management and leadership. One of the things that we kept going back to was using a lot of network science studies to explain what’s going on in organizations because organizations are fundamentally a network. That led to a growing fascination with the research in the world of network science.